Spriiiing cleaning!

Well we are approaching summer months and usually that means guys try to let loose of some winter baggage. I mean we all know why we men do it. The same reason bears hibernate in winter and emerge in summer. The same reason birds fly south for the winter and return in the summer. The same reason we don't see bee's in the winter. BECAUSE...the summer scene is so attractive and there's a possibly for something better.

I'm just sayin if you have a solid relationship then you have nothing worry about. BUT if your man has been staying out more and more and becoming less and less visible. Ummm you may be a part of his cleaning lol. Plus that's just how some guys are, always thinking there's something better. Well maybe not better but more fitting to his "relationship style"(which I'll discuss another day).

And isn't it ironic how some of us always want "space" right before it gets hot out. Yea we need space (in our beds) for the new chick lol! SO how do you combat this you ask? There's a way to kinda assure your spot for the summer....Ok you can wait....Still waiting?..............Ok here's the way to avoid this...Pick the right guy(awwwwww).Some may think that's a wack answer. But it's kind of simple right? One would think so. But some women refuse to give up on this kinda guy because a lot of women's ego's are bigger then men's! If us men continue to do "f*cked up things"(including spring cleaning) and you keep taking him back. Why would he stop? He wouldn't! Face it, get over yourself and get real. But maybe yourself esteem is that low, but that's a psychological problem and I'm not a doctor, I'm just an expert on realism.


So beware ladies out wit the old, in wit the new!

Happy Mother's Day!

There are quite a few Great Moms out there so to them I salute you. But to the mothers they use CHILD support for their own personal gain, you can eat a phat one and karma will catch up. lol

"The Chili Theory"

So I’m watching this new reality show “What Chili Wants” on VH1 (don’t ask me why) and as I watch episode after episode it becomes clear why she’s single.  There’s nothing wrong with having dating standards but this “checklist” has become somewhat infamous.  Yes a checklist, as if she’s  BUILDING a man as opposed to looking for a good one.  So here’s a rundown of the aforementioned checklist that I call “The Chili Theory”:

1. Fine/Gorgeous
2. Sensitive
3. Great Sense of Humor
4. Believe in God
5. 6 pack but she is ok with a 4 pack
6. Tall
7. Successful
8. Can have up to 2 baby mommas
9. Huge Penis
10. Don’t Drink
11. Don’t Smoke
12. Don’t Eat Pork

All this being requested by a 39 year old woman that’s never been married with a son. I mean there is NOTHING wrong with having standards. But out of these 12 things I’d say maybe 6 can be deal breakers. But the other six are just her being shallow and she may still think this is 1995 where is very much a young superstar lol. The Six deal breaker things from her list that I’d say a woman should look for at any age are:

1. Believe in God
2. Great Sense of Humor
3. Successful(or just as successful as you are)
4. Sensitive(but not a pansy)

Ummmm Ok four things. The rest of the things on her list are a bonus. I mean look lady you are 39 years old, those eggs are drying up. Floyd Mayweather stood you up. And did I mention you are like 40. I hear so many women say “I won’t settle” but what are you settling on? Lets be honest ladies(especially black women) you live in a society where you almost double the amount of successful, straight, single, healthy, God-fearing, cool, fun men??? And by the time you are 40 they are usually all gone. Which leads to older women dating younger men (See Halle Berry, Demi Moore) And to be honest the men she went out with, were NOT really interested in her, aside from just wanting to say they went out with Chili from TLC.  She basically needs to get over whatever relationship demons she’s had and be realistic with her expectations.  Because clearly from watching the show it should not be titled “What Chili Wants”, but “What Chili NEEDS”.

Grilled!...First Email Post!

First Emailed question! Woohoo!

 Dear Jameson,

I have a question: I am dating a guy who is very nice.   However, when we met, I saw his teeth was in the worst condition and I was like well, I don't have to kiss him.  But I really felt bad when one of my home boys met him and said to me " you need to tell dude, he needs to get his teeth fix".  Now every day since that day, I have been wanting to tell him but cant bring myself to do it.  But he always open the door for me to say something, like, he told me how many wigs you got.... I was like I should get him right now but didn't.  I cant bring him around my family.  I am so irritated with him now for small things.  I know he really likes me and I like him too but I can't kiss him or get pass the corroded teeth. Also, he has no sense of humor, mite be a good thing but I think I  just need to let it him go and ask him if we could just be friends. Please advise on how I should approach this?  

Grilled

Dear Grilled

 Bad teeth are never a good thing, but you did see this when you first met him. If he's comfortable enough to discuss your wigs with your friends, he should be able to discuss his teeth issues.  He may be self-conscious about his teeth so you do have to keep that in mind when you bring it up so he won't feel as though you are attacking him as opposed to trying to help him. Some people are willing to change the slightest things if it means them staying with someone they care about. 

As far as him having no sense of humor, if you can deal with that then go ahead. Most women do say they are attracted to a man's sense of humor and confidence more then anything else. So that might be a deal breaker. So if you can't get passed the bad teeth and lack of a sense of humor, it would be in your best interest to move along and just be friends.

First Post

This is the first of what I hope are many blog post.

I have quite a few female friends and acquaintances that had or currently have man issues or issues finding a man, LOL. So it takes a real open-minded person to take advice from a stranger(let alone a friend) but usually strangers give the best advice. They are unbiased and have no connection to your situation and will give you a real honest prospective on what you are doing wrong, and how to corrected it. But it's your job to take or not. It's not easy changing how you think or act. BUT you do have to be open to the possibility of change if the way you have been doing things are not working. 

We make excuses i.e. "I'm Picky", "He/She is not my type", "I won't settle". Well we all have a blueprint(I hope) of how we want our significant to be, but be realistic about your expectations.  It may take you a little bit longer to find that person, because after all you are looking for someone that you will happy with for quite a long time. 

"You can lead a horse to water but you can't make em drink"